[newfintexas]

Hi all, I know this is sort of unrelated to what you are all going through - but I have been following you all since hubby was diagnosed at the end of June. He had dacagen for 4 rounds, but nothing, in fact his wbc came up ...way too high, 18 - 27. bone marrow is no longer making red cells or platelets so the doctor stopped the chemo (aranesp did nothing) and we are going to transplant - Lee goes into the hospital next Wed and has harsh chemo for the next several days to completely wipe out his system and his transplant will happen on the 13th.

We found a perfect match - unrelated donor - a young man in his mid twenties apparently..what an unselfish thing for a young man to do for a stranger!! Lee's prognosis was not good and at 56 to know your time is limited and then to find out a young stranger is willing to try and give you life, amazing miracle.

I'm reaching out I guess, because I am so scared. I have seen this thing eat away at Lee, his cell count, his mind and body...and now although this is a wonderful possible cure - there is so much that can go wrong. It's terrifying to think of his immune system completely wiped out and then to depend on the transplant to work. I guess while you are waiting and not sure when things will happen etc, it's easy to put your fear to the side, but now we know the dates and what will happen, I am really scared and feeling so useless. I can only watch. I know lee is ok with me taking care of things while he can't - but that seems so little in this whole mess.

Thanks for letting me vent, and thanks so much for all your posts, even though I may not add much, I do read and keep up on your guys, I am praying for you guys, but wanted to let you know that you may not realize how much your wise and thoughtful messages help others here.

Laura