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Old Thu Mar 1, 2012, 12:46 AM
Neil Cuadra Neil Cuadra is offline
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Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Los Angeles, California
Posts: 2,553
Chris,

I know it seems rushed but it's good advice.

When it was decided that my wife would go to transplant, we thought we'd schedule it for a convenient time a month or two later, but her doctor said it should be done immediately, and that's what we did. It was the correct advice, even though we were surprised by it at the time. The sooner the transplant the better, because blood counts can get worse during a delay, and more transfusions might be necessary, both of which are negative factors when you are going to transplant. (The exception is if the patient has an infection or other immediate problem that must be dealt with first.)

I hate to be blunt but I don't think you can ask Ethan's permission and you simply have to tell him what's going to happen. If he's like most kids he'll take his emotional cues from you, picking up your mood, whether that's confidence or trepidation. After my wife was first diagnosed they scheduled blood tests for her relatives, to check for a fully-matched or partially-matched family donor. The kids were frightened about needles so we went as a group and had grandma go first. When they saw her matter-of-factly sit down and not flinch at all, they calmed down. Of course being a transplant donor involves more than a single needle prick, so I suggest that you have a very frank talk ahead of time with the medical staff about how you and they can help a skittish child. Distraction or rewards sometimes help, but sometimes it's just a matter of being honest but matter-of-fact, letting them know that nobody likes needles but you love them and will be there with them the whole time.
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