Thread: How to cope
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Old Sat Dec 20, 2014, 12:00 AM
JordanN JordanN is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: California
Posts: 59
Hi, Jeagles13!

What a difficult situation for you and your brother! I'm so sorry you and your brother have to go through this!

I am definitely not an expert in any way, but I did lose my mother to ovarian cancer and my father currently is on supportive care for MDS, and I have learned a few things along the way. First, everyone is different in how they deal with life's stresses (some want to talk and to know prognosis, etc while others don't), and you have to respect and support their wants. I just try to let them know that I am there if they want to talk or need help but don't push if they need space. You'll learn to read your brother's signals with time. With both of my parents, there were times when they wanted support and times when they wanted privacy and independence. It also seemed to help my parents to have things as "normal" as possible so that life doesn't become completely about their disease and treatment but mostly about the things that have always brought them happiness. With some creativity, we were able to do a lot of things that made them happy (still working for my dad!).

Also, please, don't forget about you! When your loved ones are going through such terrible illnesses, it is very hard on caregivers, too (though I feel completely honored to be able to care for my parents). Patients have their bad days, complex emotions, etc, and it can be hard to watch and you can get hurt, too. Try to find some time to take care of yourself, too!

I wish you and your brother all the best, and I will hope and pray for a happy future for you both! Love to you both!
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