Hope,
It's common and perfectly normal to feel guilty for doing things for yourself instead of for everyone else. When you're tired and your spirits lag, it's probably even harder to avoid feeling bad about it. But I hope you'll be able to shrug it off and do what you need to do. The #1 priority is health, and that includes your husband's heath, your son's health, and your health too. When the relentless pace makes you moody or grumpy, you'll be less good at helping everyone else. That means you'll be helping your family by taking care of yourself. Why should you feel guilty about that?
Even under normal circumstance, moms often try to be supermoms, working while managing a family and home, which amounts to 2 full-time jobs. When they become full-time caregivers for an MDS patient, they have 3 full-time jobs. No wonder it seems impossible to keep up!
There are experts who help people improve their time management skills. I don't have a particular person or book or website to recommend (maybe other forum members do), but getting some tips about how to get the most done in the least time would be another way to cope with the extra pressure.
It's too bad you don't have a local support group. You might start a thread in the
Your Local Area forum just in case someone else from Indiana speaks up. Have you contacted
bmt infonet? They help connect people who have had transplants, or who are going to have one, with each other. In the meantime, I'm glad you found Marrowforums, since it can help make up for the lack of people to talk to in person. If it helps to have somebody to talk to online, we're here listening.