Spend some time on the iron overload link before your dr's appt, you can ask for the tests recommended here. In addition to iron testing, get your b12, folate, copper, zinc and b6 checked. B12 needs to be at least at 500.
http://www.irondisorders.org/iron-overload
High iron in women may not show up when they are menstruating. But once they stop, it becomes more apparent.
Regarding your mom and dad....another approach would be to put it back on your dad and tell him to come clean with your mom in that you now know. Because at some point, you are going to slip and say something. Keeping secrets is very stressful and apparently, it is for him. I always remind myself that once you tell one person, it is no longer a secret. What is the worst thing that can happen?