Hi,
I know where you're coming from. When I first go sick I lost in excess of 40 kgs ( around 88 pounds). I was so thin that I was admitted to the palliative care ward, labelled as having "cachexia" and put on supplemental feeding.
So, why did people at work tell me how good I looked, "now that I lost weight". I had one man tell me that I now looked good enough to be a model. What absolute cheek. How dare they comment on how I look. It has absolutely nothing to do with anyone except family and friends.
I was put on prednisone and have regained a lot of the weight (perhaps a little too much), but now people comment on "how much better I look" and "how well I'm looking". It's really annoying when your Hb is 70, you're tired, short of breath, dizzy, irritable, you're legs don't want to move and seem to have a mind of their own and you have a hypoxic headache. But " you look SOOO much better". The worst part is you have to smile and say "thank you", while all the time you really want to tell them to either "get lost" or "I feel as sick as a dog actually".
Ohhh !!! This feels so good to write down. It's something that I think and then get the guilts that I'm not being a nice person. I am learning that life is being what other people need you to be and not what you feel like being.
I love that cable TV show "Grumpy Old Women"..... I see myself in it all the time.
Chirley
