[Julianna]

Hi all. This might sound like a strange question, but I read somewhere that it is good to know for yourself what your transplant means to you. Because when you are going through the difficult bits of it, it's good to keep focus on what you are wanting from this. And of course "LIFE" is the obvious reason for most of us... but is there more to it for me? Or you? I'm really seeking this out.

It's a long story that I won't bore you with all the details, but this year I sadly said good-bye to a very important part of my life. And I hoped the agony of that would soon be over. And now I'm facing BMT by myself, and I want to be ok with that. Is there new life for me out the other side of this? I guess I would just like to know where my life is going... and goals are hard to put in place when grief and depression seems to rule my life.

BMT is a new beginning... but for what? I need to find that out for myself. Just thinking out loud. But welcome any thoughts...

Jules