My busy household

[Simmo]

Hello everyone, I would like to introduce myself as a care giver, I live in England in a small two bedroom house, in a sleepy village. with me are three other adults I give care to and my two boys the four legged kind buddy and Simmo.
My parents were unable to cope in their own home abroad so two family members and myself flew over to bring them back. They arrived with there lives in four suitcases.
Both in there eighties this was quite a journey for them both physically and mentally. I was prepared I thought! For the task of caring for them and my husband who along with vascular disease had a triple heart bypass 12 years ago and is diabetic insulin dependant for almost 50 years
Emotions were fragile for the first couple of month my parents centering around what they had given up to come over, not considering what sacrifices I had also made. Now only working part time and restrictions of movement for myself and my dear husband who is a gentle kind man.
I had forgotten how my mother needed to be the centre of attention even though my father needed more TLC due to his frailty he has MDS/MPN-UC requiring two weekly blood transfusions of 3 units of blood, becoming extremely weak and disoriented by the second weekend before his transfusion on the Monday.
So a heart to heart had to be had with my mother who unfortunately also elaborates on the truth. Causing friction within the household. By this time I realised I was now dealing with three teenagers, not adults, all after the maximum of attention. I then realised I was not as prepared as I thought.
The offers of help from my three brothers and sisters re respite did not happen, until my other sister who lives abroad came over at Christmas and rocked the boat and made them take some responsibility, so next weekend will be my second weekend alone with my husband in seven months
My mother has had cancer three times this time no treatment is possible due to her skeletal frame and her 1 and a half lungs and other underlying problems she weighs fully dressed with shoes on 35 kilos. But still runs around like a rabbit when she needs something for herself otherwise she gets my dad to do it if I am not available, hence his fall yesterday. (I was in the bath). Soon out and down stairs he was lucky this time he got away with a graze and hurt pride, as I lifted him up.
I am trying hard not to judge anyone but it is difficult, but have to have heaps of sympathy for Mum as she is also struggling albeit mentally with her mortality and I can never and will never understand how hard it is for her.
Lastly my poor quite gentle husband struggles each day saying very little, so is easily forgotten. So each time we spend alone together is his special time and I relish every second we spend alone together.
As for work I find this is my time albeit helping other deal with life's ups and downs and being heard in the system of things, I can be me and forget the day to day tribulations and also appreciate I am lucky to have what I have.
Finally I joined this group to help me understand what my father is dealing with and maybe gain some insight from other people's experiences.